A Few Honest Thoughts About Being a Pastor's Wife-Part 2

I had originally intended to write only one post about this topic, but I realized I had more to add.  Not more to add because I want sympathy, or affirmations, but more to add because I realize that many don't know a great deal about ministry life and it be helpful if they did.

So, as I mentioned in my original post, my husband his been a pastor for nearly a decade now.  There was a steep learning curve for him and I fully confess he still doesn't have it figured out.  Ministry is a little like teaching in that the work doesn't fit into neat little time blocks.  You may work hours before you actually "clock in" for the day and you may continue to work long beyond your designated quitting time.

The clincher for my husband is that it's soul saving work.  He may go to the hospital early to visit a patient before surgery but he's most focused on the condition of the patient's soul and their relationship (or lack of relationship) with the Lord.  He may do office work during business hours but then he'll be called in for a suicidal teen that showed up at youth group and will stay with that child through the early morning hours. And, because of the very nature of this work, his family will take a backseat.  Especially if he's the pastor of a small congregation.

For my husband, he is just not able to justify coming home to play CandyLand with the kids before bed when these types of situations are the epitome of his work.  His heart for the lost is so strong that he simply can't see the forest for the trees.  The members, attendees, visitors, once a year guests of the church are his focus.  Because he longs for their souls to be saved.  These factors make it incredibly difficult to balance family life and ministry.

I know that church members have legitimate concerns about the work pastors do.  A lot of us like to see results and be able to measure success.  Ministry is truly a marathon.  Pastors can sow seeds in certain people for years before the tiniest sprout ever begins to appear.  I give most pastors the benefit of the doubt.  I believe that they are doing their work to the best of their ability.  Their family may even be taking a far, far backseat so that they may carry out what they've been called to do.